(Inspired by Ayya Anandabodhi, Rohini “Wandering Star”, and Joseph Goldstein)
Bathe all your worries in the sweet syrup breath of metta
Nothing can ever taste bitter this way
Nothing can harm a you that isn’t there
Citta knows exactly what is needed
Citta can show you the way
I’ve lived here for so long
And failed to recognize this shelter
The strong structural support
The ability to frame all experience in love
May the heart hold beauty and terror
In the same loving space
May this be the house of awakening
There are so many dizzying definitions of happiness. Buy this, go here, have this kind of family and home.
When you get quiet, when the neon lights and the buzz of false advertising fall away, what’s left? Who do you trust? What can you rely on? What brings a lasting sense of contentment, peace? What helps you face the full spectrum of life’s ruthless and benevolent promises?
These questions are not meant to taunt you, but to encourage rest and reflection into this very moment. If you lost everyone and everything you loved, where would you seek shelter?
I’ve chased happiness like an elusive butterfly, believing I could get close enough, freeze-frame it and own it forever. The pursuit of enlightenment has been no different. THIS is the teacher, retreat, program, and/or practice that holds the key to the locked door inside me. Someone else has it. Not me.
What does it mean to take our seats, not just on the metaphoric chair or cushion, but in our lives, with each other, all beings, the Earth, in this moment? Let’s start here. Here is where all the action is, where all the healing takes place.
May you find that key and unlock a little more each day from the inside out. May fear/outcome-based expectations become heart-based aspirations.
Maybe it’s not enlightenment or bust.
Maybe it’s enlightenment and trying again.
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