It needs the right temperature to bloom
To open to its surroundings
In full disclosure without apology
For the time it took to recognize
It’s power and purpose
For the time it took to grow
I used to think there were only
Two realities for this lotus heart--
Stuck in the mud of suffering
Or fully open to the sun
And never contemplated
The possibility of still blooming
After reading an article from The Mindful Self-compassion February newsletter, I was struck by these words:
“And so, for today, I practice self-compassion by congratulating myself on how far I have come – and I refuse to beat myself up over how far I have yet to go.”
How often do I hold myself to a higher standard, some ideal that’s hard to perfect? If I’m stuck in the mud of suffering, I must have done something wrong. I forget that causes and conditions affect certain outcomes that are beyond my control. And if I’m in full bloom, radiant and joyfully open to the sun, there is a subtle expectation that it must always be this way. No other version is worth acknowledging.
As I was having dinner with a dear friend this week, she pointed to the jasmine bud in my teacup. I stopped paying attention to it after pictures were taken and we were savoring dinner and sweet conversation. “Look. It’s still blooming!”
It’s helpful to remember that just as the jasmine tea bud needs the optimal temperature to bloom, so does this heart-mind. It takes time to understand each moment and what it requires. There are times when skillful speech and action are the norm, and times when I’m triggered by old patterns. To open to my surroundings in full disclosure without apology, to feel power and purpose at the core of my being, I need to remember there are more than two realities.
I am not a static being, but forever changing. There is forgiveness for forgetting that I am still blooming.
RSS Feed